Back-to-School, Big Feelings: How to Support Your Child Through Transitions

It’s that time of year again! The school supply aisles are packed, the routines are shifting, and your child might be showing signs of stress, excitement, or… both.

Back-to-school season can be a big emotional experience for kids and their parents. Whether your child is starting school for the first time, switching grades, or returning after a tough year, transitions stir up a lot, especially for kids who feel deeply or struggle with change.

So, how do you help your child ride these emotional waves without getting swept up in them yourself?

Here are a few things to keep in mind:

1. Regression Is Normal
   Maybe your child starts acting younger, becomes clingier, or suddenly forgets skills they had mastered. That doesn’t mean they’re falling apart; it means they’re seeking safety during a time of uncertainty. Offer extra comfort and connection without judgment. They’re doing the best they can with what they have.
2. Prepare, But Don’t Over-Prep
   Yes, it’s helpful to talk about school routines and practice the morning schedule, but too much talk can raise anxiety. Instead, balance conversations with lightness and play. Try role-playing school scenarios or reading back-to-school books to keep things engaging and low-pressure.
3. Validate the Feeling, Then Empower the Action
   If your child says “I’m scared” or “I don’t want to go,” resist the urge to fix it or say “You’ll be fine.”

Instead, try:
 🗣️ “It makes sense that this feels big. You’ve never done this before!”

Then follow up with:
 🗣️ “Let’s come up with a plan for what you can do if you feel nervous.”

This builds emotional resilience and lets them feel capable, not dismissed.

4. Create a Safe Landing
   Mornings might be rushed and school days long, so think about what helps your child decompress after school. A quiet moment together, a favorite snack, or time to move their body can help them regulate. You don’t have to solve everything, just be there and listen.
5. Regulate Yourself First
   Transitions are hard for grown-ups, too! If you’re feeling overwhelmed or anxious, your child will pick up on it. Take a breath. Talk to someone. Remember: you don’t have to be perfect, just present.

Big transitions bring big emotions, but they’re also a chance to build connection, safety, and skills your child will carry for life. You’re already doing so much by just showing up and caring.

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